Last night, i was having a chat with Nik. We talking about our lives. Talking about how life has kinda like been really good to us thus far. Especially me... I admit. Haha.

Once again, I really do think that there's a God out there. Really i mean, i really have all along believed he exists, and now i do too. I mean i realise there's been so many things that one might consider that have really started off a real chain reaction in my life, and without it, it might have been so different. Somehow they have all came in and fallen into perfect place. How can you say its all been coincidence? =) Since, i still consider myself a Christian, i kinda believe its actually God's plan for me. =)

I remember, back in secondary 2, that was probably my roughest year of my life. Everyday was like the worse day of my life, for really plenty of reasons. I got into plenty of trouble. Mixed around with bad company, didn't know my limit, constantly distracted by girls, really quite a few... (prob just my teenage hormones then or somethin xD)... But anyways... Yeah, got into trouble in school, both with the school rules and my friends. Parents were constantly disappointed and upset, constantly on my back all day almost everyday. I was just like the most depressed kid in the world, didn't know where or who to turn to really. I was honestly just considering of just doing suicide. And Really... I mean.. really... just suicide. I was even thinking and considering the various methods of committing suicide and ending my misery. Well I gotta admit, one of the key things that has obviously stopped me from doing so was when i read a line that Lance Armstrong once said... "what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger", and of course i managed to get closer with a couple of new friends that really kinda helped me through my secondary 2 school days. Yeah... you know who you are la... JUSTIN.. MOSES. =)

Really, that year felt long. I lost so many friends! That year alone, i kinda lost this fren Cheryl Lim whom i used to really keep in contact with almost everyday, we were pretty close and all, till we got into a few quarrels regarding several issues and we kinda like yea "parted'. That was kinda like yea... wasted to me. Just over some idiotic stupid stuff. Zz. Hmm, i also lost another fren that i had with me since primary 5. Yeah. Nigel Wee. =) The guy whom everybody knew would be almost always together with me all the time. When we stopped being frens over some major incident, everybody was like all... o0 mann those 2 no longer frens. So Yep.

My examination results during the year was just absolutely terrible. I did really badly. That year, i think i failed like 4 out of 8 subjects or so that i was taking. The rest of the subjects just probably barely scrapping, surprisingly my chinese i didn't do too badly though. So obviously my parents were just utterly disappointed and constantly on my back all the time. Knowing my academic results, the trouble i got into in school and all. That year, everything just didn't go well at all. But surprisingly! i miraculously still made it into the express stream the following year. God knows how i did that. A hand full of my other classmates that year, did not make it. Especially the group that i hung out with in class that year a lot, most of them did not make it. Among our group, i think only Nigel and I made it into the express stream. We just barely made it. Just barely across the 50 percent mark. I remember mine was something like 50.9 percent or something.

Now, at that point i really felt... Wow my life was so darn pathetic then. It got slightly better when everything settled down and all during the new year in secondary 3. Nigel and I were posted to the same class. We really did not talk to each other till like the 2nd half of the year, that was actually thanks to a common female fren that we both shared, Dawn Chik. Yeah, she's been a pretty good fren. What happened actually was that, she invited both of us to go watch her compete in a squash competition, and suggested that both of us go together. So, because of that both of us kinda started communicating again. And before we knew it, we became good frens all over again. Before secondary 3 started, when i told Dawn that Nigel was going to be in the same class as each other, and knowing that we were kinda like enemies then, she told me God has a plan for you, i believe that both of you would be frens again one day. And wow... really... What she said really came true.

After we became frens, everyday in class became a little more comfortable obviously. During secondary 4, i got to know another fren, Nicholas Tan. A lot of people didn't really like him in class, but i was actually fine with him as he was a pretty nice guy. I know people didn't like him because of his occasional crazily bad breath and sometimes his crazily obnoxious behaviour. Hmm now he's like changed quite a bit people, he's really a real nice guy as i always knew.. pple... xD  Anyways, Yeah, during then... i was really into English Music a lot. I was really really into it. I could name you like almost every English music artist in the industry and all, their famous songs, so on and so forth. Nicholas was a guy like me who was into Music as well. But one day, he introduced to me Wang LeeHom. The artist as you all know, who's my music idol now. =) haha. Umm, Yeah, at first i didn't really think much of this artist, till one day i spent a bit of time listening to his music. And i really started to like and enjoy his music. Thats when it all started. Chinese Music... And Leehom! LOL.

Ok now... progressing further into my secondary 4 days. As you all know, for secondary 4 students, the big thing for us is the O level examinations. During this year i became really good frens, like best frens, with this girl... Charmaine. Nigel actually brought me to Bishan Library during the O level days to study. Yep i went obviously, studying alone is really tough. =X especially for exceptionally long periods. So during then, i was going to Bishan library pretty often. Then, i found out that Charmaine actually goes there to study too occasionally. So a couple of times when Nigel couldn't accompany me to the Bishan library to study, i studied together with Charmaine. As we spent more time with each other, we developed a mutual "liking" for another. YESS PEOPLE YESS... THAT KIND. =)  Hmm anyways, then for some crazy reason we like yeah... decided to be a couple and all during that period since we figured that yeah, both of us already liked each other.

After studying for a while with Nigel and Charmaine during the O level days, as the examinations dates approached closer and closer, Charmaine's parents got her to study at home instead. Now, it was just left with Nigel and I. During this time, Nigel introduced to me people he had been mixing around with while studying at Bishan Library. During this time, i got to know more friends. Yess Yess... Audrey, Jasmine, Jin Rong, Hazel... you guys. =) Yes. We enjoyed each other's company quite a bit. After our O levels postings were out, surprisingly we were all posted to the same Polytechnic! Lol! Even Charmaine! Well, except for Nigel, he went to Temasek. But yeahh.

During the post O-level period, somewhere during December, before Christmas... Charmaine and I broke up. At that point, initially i did feel kind of a sense of relief as i was getting quite a bit exhausted in the relationship. But after a while, i mean i did really have feelings for her, i started to miss her quite a bit as we almost totally did not communicate or so for like a month, as she was busy working as a waitress in Thai Express. When we managed to get into contact with one another again after she quit her job, she seemed a pretty different person from before. Somehow, we just couldn't connect like before too. I wasn't sure why either, she really left me really quite confused and kinda depressed for the rest of the year. Like after all those time that we had been frens and all, and i felt like she was treating me pretty coldly. I tried as much as i could to get close with her as she once asked me to promise her after we broke up, but she just wouldn't let me. I had no choice but to just back off.

During this time, i got closer with my other frens that i made during the O level days at Bishan Library. I got closer to Jasmine and Audrey. Even had a brief infatuation with Jasmine and all as well. But nah it was never gonna be much anyways haha. Nevertheless we still remained as good frens. Audrey joined me in enlisting for the same CCA in poly, Piano Ensemble. Both of us managed to get in, thank God for it. =) During my first year there, i honestly had quite a lot of fun and memorable memories with that club. Made new frens there as well. Got to know Wenxin, whom has been a remarkable fren. =) No regrets joining the club, even though now it doesn't seem so bright anymore. =X But oh well. =)

During my Poly life, i've also became good frens with one of my classmates, Nik Chua. He's been a good fren to me, i thank God for it. We've stucked with and for each other throughout our Poly life. We've been through a hell lot of nonsense in Poly so far. Haha. We've given advice to each other on the various obstacles that we meet. So far, i think we've been doing just Alright. What actually got us to click with each other was the fact that his idol was Jay Chou and that my idol was LeeHom. Hence, we constantly talked to each other about music and both their different styles and talents in music. We both speak English, and we both share common interests such as poker, the piano, music, food and all. A perfect companion to have in school, wouldn't you recon with me? =)

Occasionally, i still meet up, hang around, and talk to Nigel, Audrey, Jasmine, Jin Rong and all. We're always pretty happy to see each other really. They're all awesome frens that i've been blessed with. With them in the same polytechnic as well, easy to keep in touch with, I don't believe that this is just another coincidence. =)

You see! I really do believe in God! Look at the stuff in my life, it's all connected! It can't be just mere coincidence! Nigel who was in the same class as me in Pri 5 to 6, went to the same secondary school and class with me and became such good frens! We looked out for each other in Secondary school, he sort of pushed me to study which has got me till where i am thus far, and i thank god for it. He was also actually the one that introduced to me Charmaine back in Sec 1 or so, when i first got to know her. Well anyways, later on, with the group of people i studied with in Bishan Library, that has also followed me into the same polytechnic. Nicholas who introduced to me Leehom, has now been the driving force to get me to be serious with my music, got me into piano and to practise my piano to get good. Which also sparked me to joining Piano Ensemble in Poly as a CCA meeting wonderful people and having experience awesome experiences with the people there and learn more about music as well, it also served as a 'break' from my academics in school as well. I couldn't ask for more. Nicholas and i still keep in touch even though we're in different polytechnics, looking forward to catching up with him and the rest of my frens during the holidays. =) And really, what doesn't kill me has indeed made me stronger now.

After going through so much, i've still been blessed with so many frens and it has really helped me cope better with various obstacles that i face in life. So many different people that i've met in my life has all helped me in life in a miraculous chain effect, in the small things that they do. Had i not been good frens with Nicholas, i probably wouldn't know the piano, chinese music as i do today. I probably wouldn't be in the CCA i am in now, and not been able to meet amazing new frens that i've gotten to know throught that CCA as well. My life in Poly just wouldn't be the same! Had it not been for Nigel, i have no idea where i would be in my life now as well. I might not even be in Poly who knows. I'd definitely have known lesser frens. Many things now wouldn't be the way it is as well. I probably wouldn't know Dawn, Charmaine, and the rest of the Bishan Library people. So, i really got to thank God for that. Now in Poly a whole different environment from my primary and secondary school and all as well, i get to meet so many different people and experience so many different things, i really do believe it's not just another coincidence either.

Everything has kinda like happened and has kinda like landed me perfectly in where i am right and how i am right now. Its amazing how just one person can change your life so extraordinarily. So, never take any of your frens for granted or that they are less important to certain other things in life, you never know what might happen because of them! Hmm, the only thing right now thats going through my head is that out of all the schools in Singapore, Charmaine so happened to go to the same school as me now as well and recently we kinda like finally talked again after forever or so. Hmm, is that God's plan too? Will something happen in the future? If there is, what would it be? Now, is it really just coincidence? After being good frens to a couple, to not talking to each other, to now a little chatter on her birthday. Its crazy. After all that's happened in my life, you'd kinda expect her to reappear again somewhere in my life right? haha. Oh well, i shall just have to wait and see. =) Leave it to God.

I just have so many things and other frens that i wish i can add here on my life, but then i won't be able to stop typing. =) Its just been 18 years or so, already so much has happened. God knows what's next right? =)

Jeb, i remember you once said you wanted to do a biography on my life when you grow up. If you're reading this, this is your chance to collect some material. Haha. xD

ya serious... quitting poker. =) i dun wanna be so poker headed anymore. =) Concentrate on Good food and Music instead. =)